Wednesday, January 20, 2010

milestones

Oh my -- I started this post back on Jan 20th. New proof that I suck at this whole blogging thing. I could blame it on the baby, but really I wasn't all that much better before he came along. But the reason for the post was to document a milestone. The day I started writing he was 39 weeks and 1 day. If counting by the day of month he hit the 9 month mark the following day, but if counting by weeks it was the day before. Either way, I can't believe my baby is 9 months (now 9 months and a few weeks!) old.

He had an uneventful appointment with the doctor. Only 1 vaccination and he only cried for a second. He weighed in at 23 1/2 lbs and is at the 90th percentile for his weight. He's 29+ inches = 80th percentile for height. His big sis was only 16 pounds, 5 oz at 9 months, so the ache in my back and arms is NOT in my head.

Little man is crawling all over the place and pulling himself up on anything that he can grab. I don't know if it's a boy thing or a coincidence, but he's already into things that his sister never even noticed. For instance, he'll go after and try to chew on any electrical cord within reach and shoes. He also is fascinated with the vacuum cleaner, the CD player in his room, and his humidifier. I just spent a ridiculous sum of money on a play yard which will take up probably half of our upstairs living space, but there's no way around it. There's no good way to keep him contained and even if there were, there's not a really good baby safe space in our house. Now if only it will stop snowing so that the play yard can get here.

The little guy exhausts me because he doesn't sleep well, and he exhausts me because now that he's mobile I can't take my eyes off of him, but he's damn cute and I really can't get enough of him.

Friday, January 8, 2010

More Photos

Feeling the need to share a little cuteness. I'm feeling a bit better than I was yesterday, but I do have a few posts on things floating around in my head. Hope to get some of it typed out but that would require time (hahahahaha!).

On a more positive note I'll provide a few Ben updates. He now has 5 teeth (good for biting mom!) and is army crawling all over the place. He hasn't figured out how to get his legs in on the action, but he can pull himself all the way across a room with just his arms. His favorite food is plain yogurt. He's getting picky about other food and sometimes I have to dip it in yogurt to get him to eat it. He doesn't really like much with any texture yet, but he does seem to like the baby puffs -- if only he could get them in his mouth! I tried some mashed (but not pureed) banana the other day and he made the ugliest little face and then gagged and threw up all over me.

After not noticing them for almost 8 months, Ben has finally discovered the cats. He is obsessed and lunges towards them whenever he sees them. He also will twist himself almost completely around in the highchair to get a look at them.

Lucy is still 7 going on 17. Within a span of 10 minutes she can be begging to sit on my lap, hugging me and kissing me and then stomping around with such an attitude. She told me the other day "mommy, you just don't get it!" Sheesh, I thought I'd have a few more years before I got that kind of BS thrown at me. ;)

On the bright side she still adores Ben, and I'm pretty sure that she is his favorite person. He just squeals whenever she's around.

Without further ado here are some more photos from the past couple of months.

At Thanksgiving trying to get some good Christmas card photos.






Playing with the box is more fun than playing with the toys




Playing in the snow in front of the "clubhouse" her grandfather built her




A closeup from Christmas break

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Trying

to cheer myself up. I could go on and on about all the things that are bothering me right now, but instead I'll post some things here that always put a smile on my face -- hope they bring one to yours too. One of the things I love about Ben's daycare center is that they routinely take lots of photos of the kids and send them out. These are all from his daycare center. The first and last are my favorites. He just looks so skeptical of Santa in the first, and in the last just so happy.




Tired

Tons of thoughts swirling in my head, but I can't ever find the time or energy to get them out.

Am tired and sad. Love the kids and am sooo grateful for them. I know I'm just damn lucky to have them, much less a home, a job, health insurance, healthy family, etc. But I'm dissatisfied. This is not how I envisioned my life. Too busy, too little time with the kids, no time for myself, no time to spend with my husband. I know a lot of this is coming from a place of sheer exhaustion. Ben still isn't sleeping particularly well and I'm averaging 4 to 5 interrupted hours of sleep a night. Also something set me off today that is so stupid I can't bring myself to say what it is, but still it's got me frustrated. I know I need to focus on what I have, but fuck it right now I just want to feel sorry for myself a bit.

I've got lots of Ben and Lucy updates and photos to post, will do it soon as that will cheer me up, but just needed to do something to get this out a bit - besides cry at my dining room table.

Thanks for listening.