Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Beginning of the End

Thanks again everyone for all the comments and support.

I'm not really sure what to say right now other than today's appointment did not go well. Things are not measuring as they should be so I was instructed to stop all my meds and come back on Friday to make sure things progress as they should. Given my history and the fact that my body doesn't seem to function properly AT ALL when it comes to this stuff, I wouldn't be surprised if I end up needing a another D&C to deal with this. I sort of flip flop between feeling like I won't ever stop crying and feeling really numb. Exactly two weeks ago tonight I took those tests that came out positive. I feel like I've been clinging to a yo-yo ever since. Ironically, before those tests I was feeling pretty good. Now, having come soooo close to getting what I want, I feel worse than ever.

12 comments:

Meghan said...

Oh no, I am so so unbelievably sorry you are going through this. Talk about not fair.

Thinking and praying for you all

Valerie said...

I am so sorry.

Anonymous said...

Oh, sweetie! I am so sorry you have to go through this again. Totally sucky and unfair. xxx

dmarie said...

I'm so sorry.

Leah said...

Oh Bean, I'm so so so sorry. I know there is nothing whatsoever I can say to make it better right now. Just please know I'll be praying for you and sending you thousands of hugs. xo

Anonymous said...

SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!!!

Oh Bean, what can I say! I'm devestated for you, sincerely. SIGH!

HUGS XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Serenity said...

FUCK.

Oh Bean, I am so, SO sorry.

Love to you.

xxxxx

Shelby said...

I'm so, so sorry! I'm sending you hugs, and thinking about you constantly.

Waiting Amy said...

FUCK is right.

I am so sorry Bean. I wish so much that it had been different. And that we all could be there to hold your hand. And we are, as best we can.

Sending peace your way.

Jill Tice said...

Bean, I am so sorry!

I will be thinking about you and praying for things to turn around!

battynurse said...

I'm so sorry.

In and Out of Luck said...

I'm so, so sorry. I had an experience very similar (surprise pregnancy on an interim cycle, huge beta that then didn't double, nurse and doctor who said the not doubling could be OK since it was high, ultrasound that gave me hope, then ultrasound that was not good.) I know exactly what you mean when you say you felt OK before and now you feel worse than ever. I'm so sorry.