Monday, October 27, 2008

We Told!

My in-laws were in town over the weekend and we told them. Before they arrived I asked my husband if he didn't think it would be weird to be spending most of the weekend with them and have this hanging out there. Plus, I suggested that if we lose this pregnancy at this point or later, wouldn't he want to have them to talk to about it. So, he told and then I spent about 4 hours on Sunday, while my husband and FIL took our daughter out to the pumpkin patch, talking to my MIL about it and listening to her tell me not to go up and down the stairs. WTF? And giving me dirty looks later on when my daughter sat on my lap and wanted to be tickled. I'll confess that a little part of me was actually starting to regret that we told them. But I'll be fair and say that the majority of our time together was fine and I know she's just concerned. Her other daughter-in-law is also pregnant right now (about 8 weeks further along than me) and she has also suffered through several miscarriages and has had a very rough pregnancy. So I get that my MIL now has something else to worry about, but what I really need are for people to be supportive and rational, not treat me like I might break at any moment. Of course, I'm being careful and frankly, I think I'm being overly cautious as it is. But I'm fairly certain that walking up and down one flight of stairs is not going to jeopardize this pregnancy.

***

My daughter thinks it's a big secret all of sudden, but she is still wishing for a new baby every day. She suddenly refuses to tell us what her "wish" is, but complains EVERY day that "it" hasn't come true. I'm actually a bit worried that when we finally tell her about the baby, she's going to think it's because of her magic wand wishes. I've also realized recently that she is incredibly jealous and a little angry that my sister-in-law is pregnant. She found out from my MIL about the same time that I did -- when my SIL was only about 6 weeks along. We've had some really odd conversations about the size of our extended family and the ages of all the kids and switching houses with my BIL/SIL. After a couple of these it finally dawned on me what the issue was and apparently this weekend she had some similar conversations with my MIL, who came to the exact same conclusions that I did.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

glad you told, hopefully they will be supportive

Birdee said...

I'll bet that is frustrating with your MIL, I was really careful with my self this last pregnancy because of my previous losses and the last thing I would need is someone treating me with my next pregnancy (Hopefully soon) that it was my fault my baby died. I blame my self enough as it is (naturally - not intentionally) and have to convince me that walking up that hill that day did Not kill my baby. So no, a flight of stairs won’t hurt your baby. If something is wrong, there will be nothing you can do to prevent that.
I just totally babbled but I was trying to get my point across.
I hope you can tell your daughter soon, maybe just telling her about the power of prayer vs. her thinking it’s her Magic Wand Wishes. Just a thought.

Penny said...

Glad they are generally supportive, if a little overbearing. Never heard about the stairs thing, but now I will be sure to be paranoid about that for the next 48 hours.

Meghan said...

How frustrating, hopefully they'll be nice and supportive.

And that'll be a tricky one when you tell your daughter...time for the where do babies come from talk I guess...

Lorraine said...

It's so hard to keep a secret like this! Sounds like your daughter will be thrilled when she finally does find out...

Leah said...

I'm so excited that you told! Just wait until your daughter gets the news. Yippee!!

We waited until I was about 25 weeks along to tell Megan because we knew she'd flip her lid. Which she did. (Hey, that's a rhyme!) She became obsessed with WHEN IS MY BABY BROTHER COMING and with the idea of me being in the hospital for a few days (c-section).

Hopefully your nutty little girl will take it with a larger portion of sanity.

And, by the way, who are we to assume that she didn't actually help make this happen with her magic wand wishes? (But, for the record, if we really do think that's true, please have her start wishing for me to win the lottery. Or at least for Kevin to get a job!)