The nice ladies over at Cyclesista were kind enough to add me to the June/July list. A hearty "Thank You" to them all. I don't know if anyone will bother to visit me here, but in case anyone does... Welcome, and thanks for coming.
Well, I took my first two clo.mid pills last night. It seems weird. I last took clo.mid to get pregnant with my daughter - over 5 years ago. That time I was ONLY taking clo.mid, this time I'm taking it as part of my IVF protocol. But who knows--maybe it'll be some mystical common denominator for me and I'll actually get (and stay) pregnant this time around. It's funny that I'm now looking for "signs" or connections to help me feel hopeful, because I'm really a science kind of gal and not really much of a believer in things if I don't see proof. I guess you could say Faith is not a big part of my life. I mean, I might say I have faith that something will turn out a certain way, but it's not because I believe in any kind of higher power willing it to be so. Similarly, it drives me nuts when people say "it was/wasn't meant to be", particularly about infertility. I know that in most cases these are people who are trying to be nice and comfort others, and I generally bite my tongue and don't respond. But really! I mean are you telling me someone/something/some force actually means for me to be infertile and have to go through all this pain? I don't believe it. And I don't believe it for any of the other infertiles out there either - or for that matter for people who are ill, lose loved ones, or are suffering in any way. I do believe that it just happens and it sucks! There's an awful lot of stuff in this world that's pretty shitty and I don't think any of us were "meant to" deal with it. But I will continue to bite my tongue, because I know that the people who say it are trying their best to help.
Hmmm? Not sure how I got from A to B on this one, but there it is.
To any readers out there, have a happy weekend!