Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Decisions, Decisions

So today I met with my RE today. First of all can I just say that waiting on doctors doesn't bother me all that much -- frankly I kind of expect it. So I really wasn't all that annoyed with the 30 minute wait. HOWEVER, when you are waiting to meet with your RE to discuss next steps after the failure of your 5th (and seemingly best) IVF cycle it really sucks to have to overhear all the good news the nurses are delivering to other patients. I overheard 3 phone calls in which the nurse congratulated the patients on "another great beta" and listened while she went about scheduling each of them for their ultrasounds. Then I got to hear the doctor telling another of the nurses to schedule an appointment for the patient he'd just seen because "there's a good chance she might be pregnant with twins." ARGGGGH!

Fortunately, I really like my RE and we had a nice discussion and then I got a chance to talk with my nurse and go over a variety of possible options and the associated timelines so that the husband and I can make an informed decision about what to do next.

All the way home I thought about all the stuff I'd write here regarding my feelings about what the RE said, but frankly I'm just too tired right now. In a nutshell, he said he thinks that the failure of this last cycle was just me being on the bad side of 50/50 odds and he doesn't think there is anything else going on. He is still optimistic about our chances and reiterated that my response last time was fantastic. I found out that 8 of our embryos were 8 cell, grade 1 embryos, and he said that at 38 years old, he'd have considered getting 5 as great. He thinks there's a good chance we'll get at least 2 (if not all) of our 3 frozen blasts through thaw, but he did remind me that the chances of a pregnancy are always better with a fresh cycle. So, now we need to decide if we (1) proceed with a FET next (at a cost for us of about $4000-- no insurance coverage for FETs), or (2) another fresh cycle (our last with insurance) at a cost to us of about $6500 (our insurance pays 50%), and (3) when??? In theory, summer always seems like a good time to do stuff, but we are scheduled to be out of town a few times and I'm looking at a trip to Mississippi for work in late July/early August. Even though I really don't feel that I've totally dealt with my emotions about this last cycle yet, I'm so impatient that I hate the thought of waiting. However, I know that the added stress of worrying about scheduling around trips for any kind of cycle is probably not wise.

Decisions, decisions......

12 comments:

Juicy said...

You mention 2 things I hate: waiting and decisions! Ugh. I hate doctors who make you wait, but 30 minutes isn't too unreasonable. I also dislike the fact that the doctor said some pretty inconsiderate stuff around you. When I went in after my last miscarriage, I heard a nurse call a girl to give her her beta results and she said loudly, "Oh yeah, with numbers like that, you are most definitely pregnant!" I cringed and ran to my car crying. :(

Good luck to you! We'll be starting IVF soon, so good luck to both of us!!

(here from NCLM)

Shelli said...

"In a nutshell, he said he thinks that the failure of this last cycle was just me being on the bad side of 50/50 odds and he doesn't think there is anything else going on. He is still optimistic about our chances and reiterated that my response last time was fantastic. "

Umm, do we have the same doctor? And furthermore, are we the same person? lol.

Come on, I start BCP's on July 3rd and I need a cycle buddy :)

Paranoid said...

FWIW, we flirted with the idea of going straight to another fresh cycle rather than trying an FET, for reasons similar to yours. After all, if we couldn't manage to get pregnant with 50% odds, why would we even bother with 25% odds? We finally decided to go ahead with the FET in the full expectation that it wouldn't work, and we got a pleasant surprise.

I don't mean to imply that just because lightening struck us this time that an FET will work for you. But at least it's not a totally wasted chance.

Whatever you decide, good luck!

Kim said...

I agree waiting and decisions are no fun at all! I hope you are successful with your next cycle! nclm

DC said...

I am so sorry this cycle didn't work out for you. Sitting in the waiting room with pregnant ladies is torture!

Melzie said...

Like you, I don't mind waiting- I love it as I carry thinsg to do that need to get done, great busy work!

BUt I *HATE* hearing other peoples good news. My last visit to my doc was a newly prego patient, and when she came out I found out it was my student. She's now a junior in HS- and she was so excited to share with me.

Good luck with your decision making...

Mel via NCLMo

Katie said...

Via NacomLeavmo...
Sorry the last one didn't work out. Here's hoping for next time. I hate making decisions, especially important ones like this.

Geohde said...

It isn't easy deciding what/how/when to cycle again after a failed one. I'm impressed that your RE at least makes appts to discuss that sort of thing- my clinic didn't bother with that stuff, and it used to really bug me.

But FWIW, even though FET's are lower probability, that's what worked for me in the end. Random luck? Probably.

J

La La said...

I'm terrible about making decisions too. Best of luck with whatever you decide!

PS Having the trips this summer may be an issue, but it will also be nice to not be pregnant when it is really hot out as well!

Pink-CJ said...

I know you love your Dr., but have you considered changing Dr.'s?

Monica said...

just wanted to drop in and wanted to let you know I was thinking of you. Hope things are okay... your blogger world friend ;)

Shelli said...

Thinking of you. How's things going?