Friday, June 6, 2008

Fear, Nerves, and Temptation

So if I counted the days correctly (and I'm not actually sure I did) I'm now 10dp5dt (or 10 days past a 5 day transfer). Until last night I was feeling relatively good about things. In fact, if I'm entirely honest with myself I'll admit that I've been more worried about another miscarriage than the results of the beta, which is scheduled for Monday. But something changed since last night and I'm now terrified that this didn't work at all. I'm a nervous wreck today and for the first time ever I'm feeling really tempted to POAS before the beta. But that kind of scares me too, I don't want to do it too early but I also worry about getting a positive and then finding out it's another chemical. I almost drove to the grocery store after dropping my daughter off at school this morning to pick up some tests, but I didn't. Not sure I'll be able to restrain myself on the way home from accupuncture later on. So, here's my question for anyone who might be visiting: If you were going to POAS, when would you do it?

12 comments:

Shelby said...

When I POAS, it was 8dp3dt and I got a light positive. I couldn't wait until my beta, so I didn't even bother trying. Good luck!! My fingers are crossed for you!

Meghan said...

I'm the wrong one to ask since I apparently love to pee on things. I would probably already be doing it. But, in the interest of honesty, it makes me an absolutely crazy person. If it's negative, I go a little insane, back and forth between it's too early and it's over. If it's positive, I go back and forth between being ecstatic and worrying about another chemical.

But for some reason, I also tortured myself....if you can stay strong, I'll have the utmost respect. But if you want to...I can drive over a few ;)

Wishing you a weekend full of distractions (Monday betas always seem worse to me) and lots and lots of luck Monday!

In and Out of Luck said...

If 10dp5dt equals 15 dpo, then I would imagine it is time enough. I tested on 14dpo and the result was correct. Good luck, I'm thinking of you whether you go ahead and POAS or not.

momofonefornow said...

oh my gosh, I have no patience. I would have started on 4dpo (oh wait, I did start on 4 dpo. lol!) I say go for it, you are going to be a bundle of nerves no matter what. Might as well be a little indulgent. :0)

Paranoid said...

When it comes to testing, my motto is "early and often." I start testing at 5dpt. I figure I'd rather know, even if it's bad, than not know.

Shelli said...

I'm done with testing early. For mw, it doesn't make me less crazy either way. So I guess I am in the minority here. lol.

So, you are going to drive yourself nuts no matter what, so if you want to... do it. If you can wait, then that's cool too.

Wow, I just gave a totally wishy-washy answer... didn't I? hehe

Anonymous said...

No sooner than 14 dpo-- and you're 15 :)

That said, I didn't poas with either ivf cycle-- just wasn't in me to do it.

alicia said...

I had an IUI on the 29th. I am not supposed to test until the 15th. I think I am testing on the 13th though, cause honestly I hate this 2ww!

here from NaComLeavMO

nancy said...

I'm a POASer. Always have been, always will.

(trigs)

With ~non~ IVF/FET cycles, I'm a sheer believer in "test often and early". I got a BFP at 11dpo and I loved knowing as soon as possible. I also would totally believe a 12dpo BFN to be a true BFN, even though I'd still test until AF made her appearance.

I NEVER understood why anyone would want to wait to POAS. To ~ME~, another day of not seeing a BFN was another day of increased hope, which would create a bigger FALL when the "real" BFN came.

Also, I liked to be let down gently. I'd get a BFN at 10dpo and a little hope would be chipped away. And then a little more at 11dpo. Then more and more. By the time I reached a 14dpo BFN, I wasn't sad anymore. The start of AF was just something I already knew. It was easier on my heart.

AND THEN THERE WAS MY FET CYCLE.

~ I had a 3dt and I started testing early. When I got the BFN at 9dp3dt, I totally believed it. I broke down. I cried.
~ My 10dp3dt didn't phase me. I changed my outlook and started scheduling my next IVF.
~ Then, 11dp3dt, shit. BFP. That threw me.

So - as you can see, I've changed. I haven't changed that fact I still believe POAS is a great thing, but I've learned that late implantation is a real thing and while I could chisel away at my hope, I couldn't throw all the hope away.

So, to answer your question - if I was you? I'd poas. Because, FOR ME, it would allieve all that anxiety you are feeling.

Good luck!!!

Penny said...

I would think you could do it at any time, you're about ~15 dpo equiv? I would totally want to know the head's up before the nurse called with results. But that's me: I don't like surprises.

Wishing 4 One said...

I never POAS with any of my 5 IVF's but hey if you really want to, I say do it, youre 15 days now.

Wishing you the BEST of luck Monday, really!!!! xoxoxoxo

Kim said...

I have a love/hate relationship with hpt! I would have done it a few days ago if I was going to do it - my re does it 14dpET. GOod Luck! NCLM